Låt den rätte komma in (2008) - Tomas Alfredson

when vladimir nabokov's lolita was reissued in north america by vintage in 1989, vanity fair declared it "the only convincing love story of our century." they weren't wrong. love has long since gone the way of letters and laudanum because our emotionally bankrupt time lacks the requisite investment and interest. monogamy is the new queer (you heard it here first) and i love yous, if not outright lies we tell each other and ourselves, are confessions wielded like knives to hurt someone or get something we want, which, generally speaking, ain't worth having. so what's more convincing than a bumbling pederast with delusions of agency who throws himself at the feet and the mercy of a sadistic schoolgirl in heart-shaped sunglasses?

i believe in love like i believe in vampires: yearn though i might for sanguine youth and an immortally emo soul, i know it's bullshit beginning to end. let the right one in, however, does an amazing job of momentarily convincing me otherwise. on both counts.

love and vampires are the rightful property of 12-year-old scandies who don't know any better. and while that ignorance is far from bliss - it's fraught with domestic fissure, schoolyard violence, and a ludicrous amount of snow - oskar and eli turn everyday ugliness into such beauty that it's impossible not to believe just a little. and the kids know their canon! these vamps don't sparkle in the sunshine, and whatever thresholds this film otherwise crosses, doorways remain sacred. the gore is gorgeous, the characters compelling, and the story brings even the most cynical of audiences to its cinematic knees. tension and anxiety build while the jaded and logical parts of you that remain unconvinced remind you that this is all just wishful thinking ... the more you believe, the more obvious it becomes that everything is going to end terribly.

hold fast to yr hope.

Thriller: A Cruel Picture (1974) - Bo Arne Vibenius

Swedish rape revenge at its best. I'm starting to worry that this blog is becoming a little too focused on the genre. If you are going to watch this flick, watch it in poorly dubbed English and preferably in the harder-to-find porno cut. Also titled They Call Her One-Eye, this is for the most part on the satisfying side of the rape revenge genre.

Thriller gets going in the classiest of ways: child molestation. Kind of. In a touch of artfulness, the girl is picked up by a grody old old man, who then starts spewing black bile from his grody old mouth. Awesome, right? The poor little girl, Frigga, grows up mute, traumatized, but loved by her simple farming parents who send her to the big city for a special doctor's appointment. Of course, she misses the bus and accepts a ride from a pimp-like dude in a sports car, just driving around the countryside all pimp-like. You know where this is going. After a light dinner and tons of booze, Frigga wakes up the prisoner of The Douchiest Man in Sweden. Now addicted to heroin (natch), young simple Frigga is forced into a life of prostitution, where she is awarded a "fix" for good behaviour. Mmm....total trash!

Thriller gets its points by never backing down. The film is extreme for its time, but this shit stands up 35 years later. Watching Frigga try to escape in vain while her pimp slowly drives behind her until she just passes out is some hard shit. The real cadaver used for the eye gouging. The ridiculously unnecessary hardcore fuck scenes (and accompanying money shot). The gross dude in the tiger underpants. Terrifying. Fuck it, let's have her own parents commit suicide. Scenes of Frigga slowly and silently planning her revenge against not only her pimp but her johns as well build slowly to the end we all know is coming. Her interactions with her instructors offer a welcome break from the black hole that is her life. Action sequences are all slow-mo, I suspect to cover the poor choreography as much as for any stylistic purpose. But it works. This little girl is gonna kill both hired thugs AND cops? In a warehouse fight?! Fucking slo-mo that shit and I will believe it.

The film builds to one of the most satisfying final kills I've ever seen. Frigga isn't blinded by rage, but cold and calculated, exact. It's a bit chilling and so perfect. Thriller is far from a perfect film, however. At times, it's laughably bad. I mean, she gets a day off every week to do whatever she wants? How about gun lessons? Driving lessons? Fucking martial arts lessons? OKAY. And she doesn't bail because of the heroin? Like you can't find that shit elsewhere? Fucking eye patches that match different outfits? I love it, though. I love it all. A million fucking points.